Pictures imperfect

Private Property South Africa
Andre Fiore

It’s been another tough day of cyber shopping, and I’m beginning to wonder if I’ll ever find another place I’d like to call my own. Despite the luxury of being looked after, divorce is becoming tempting, simply because there are quite a few pretty little places that would suit me perfectly if I was on my own and if I didn’t have to house the clubs, the canoes and the kit.

But then I wouldn’t have someone to put out the rubbish or check when the alarm goes off, so maybe not.

I must say, the things I’ve been exposed to in my searches have been alarming enough. More than a normal person should have to see. Lounges so grim that instinct howls at you to head for the hills, walls painted those colours that yelp for help and the chaos that some people share with the world. You’d think they’d get someone in to clean before they took the pics. Or even tidy it themselves. In the end it must come down to pride. And surely it follows that someone aspiring to buy a place as messy as a pigeon’s nest, could possibly be messy in other areas too, which may not be promising when it comes to making payment.

It’s not a family affair

But even that isn’t so bad. Bad décor and bad housekeeping be they as they may. My cyber travels have revealed far worse. Family snaps. At first I was embarrassed and thought I’d got to a private type of site, but a glance up assured me I was on a local property portal. And I gathered that some people, in their haste to get shot of their houses, seem happy to showcase almost any snap, as long as there’s some part of a room showing. Even if it’s just the bits around their boyfriend in bed. I can of course understand if they’re wanting to get rid of their partners, it may be effective: take him with the house, he’s messy too!

But their children? Their toddlers? It’s sort of similar to putting a phone number and address around your little one’s neck and sending it out into the street. Though from the street, passersby can’t see phone numbers that well. They’d have to stop their cars. In cyber space they are perfectly visible. And there forever.

Prudence surely and safety have a place in the property world. I called my fastest 087 number to make sure, and of course there is a service. Sellers can get their homes quickly styled, their photos professionally taken, their toddlers and partners banished from all pics, all for a very do-able fee. The result is a pleasure for buyers too: a clean, professional portal where one isn’t exposed to small dark pics or small children. Thank you Private Property for protecting our people!

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